I can never win!

I'm hurting today.

BAD.

I bent over this morning to pull my socks up and that's when it happened.  My back just decided it was going on hiatus.  Sometimes if I sit just right, I can't breathe.  That can't be good.  This time, it's in the very middle of my back and I know exactly why it happened.

I finally got my husband to join me at the gym.  It's been pretty fun actually.  Monday, I was all nervous becuase I thought he was going to pass out or even worse have a stroke.  I was on the elliptical machine and he was on a treadmill two rows in front of me.  I think I cranked my neck to look at him every thirty seconds.  I was so worried about him because he hadn't eaten before we left for the gym.  If you know anything about him at all you know the man eats like every 2 hours.  He has some sort of sugar problem (I think it's all in his head but sometimes he does get all white and sweaty).  So, he has to eat snacks all the time.  Except Monday he didn't.  I asked him as we were pulling into the parking lot at the gym if he ate something and I probably shouldn't have brought it up because then he started to worry about it too.

Anyway, he made it through the 25 minutes on the treadmill and then I took him over to the weight machines and we started working on our arms.  I tried to tell him that he didn't need to put the pin that high up on the weight but he didn't listen.  I told him that he might want to make it a little easier on himself this first time so he can get used to it but he was being macho.  I reminded him that we have three sets of each workout to do but he blew me off.  I thought to myself how funny it was going to be in the morning when he woke up and couldn't shave his face because his arms were going to be soooooo sore.  But, he didn't listen to me.  I don't want to have to say "I told you so."

So yesterday we get up and he's all;

I told you I wasn't going to be sore.  You think I'm a wimp don't you?  Just because I haven't worked out in two years.  Ha!  I'll show  you!

Y'all, I was pissed.  I have been to the gym since the week before Christmas and my ass gets sore every.single.day!  Every Tuesday, I suffer through blow drying my hair.  Every Thursday I can't sit on the toilet.  Hell, right now my wrists are hurting just to type! This is not even funny.  It's like 4 years ago when we decided we were going to stop drinking soft drinks.  My husband doesn't drink caffiene at all but he could tear up some Sprite.  Not diet either because he says it has an after taste.  Anyway, we stopped drinking soft drinks and that assface lost 21 lbs in two weeks.  WTF?  Just because he stopped putting all that sugar in him he loses 21 lbs?  Just for that I started drinking back drinking Sprites right in front of him.

So, yesterday we go to the gym and I'm pissed becuase he's not sore.  Yesterday was legs day.  We both had a killer cardio workout and then I was going to tear him up on our legs.  We did the whole routine and then I saw this guy shredding out some crunches on a new machine.  I decided we'd try that.  While hubs was shredding his crunches on that ab machine I decided I was getting on the CORE STRENGTH TRAINER.  That's right....I'm gonna strengthen my core!  I get my fat but up there and start twisting away.  No problem.  Left side, then right side.  I can already feel my core strengthening!  Hubby passed on that machine.  Said he didn't need it. 

Yep.  My core is so strong today that I can't even bend over to pull my socks up! 

I can't laugh.

No coughing coming from me. 

When I sneeze I scream.

Wipe my ass?  Forget it.

DH just left me a voice message that said: "I told you so".

Prick.